Dreams and nightmares.
What are dreams? Are they a manifestation of your inner thoughts? A metaphor of what you have been? Or are they just a preview of what you ever wished for?
Then again, what are nightmares? Are they dreams gone wrong? Or are they just your manifestation of your deepest, darkest secrets? Or maybe just your fear taking control.
Personally, I don't know. But I sincerely hope it's none of the above, and they're just random things that flood your head. Because if they were a manifestation of your thoughts or secrets, or maybe a metaphor of what you feel.. Then why does my dreams these days reek of killing and death..?
No, I'm not lying, and no, I'm not exaggerating. Maybe I've lost some of the details, but they're not too far from what I dreamt about. So please bear with me on my.. gruelling description.
First, it happened quite a long time ago, around 2 weeks ago, right when I came back from Hongkong. It was pretty vague, a bunch of guys said they had problems with how I acted and came to 'settle things'. And before you know it, it went horribly wrong. I went ahead and pull a punch on their 'leader's' face, slamming his face till it was bleeding, then smacking his face down on the floor, totally rupturing his nose, before I grabbed a metal plank and smashed it on his face. ( Which I must admit felt pretty darn good. ) Then it flashed to a scene I ripped his clothings apart and impaled the plank somewhere guys are weak at. What was infront of me was a boy, with a bleeding head that's slightly twitching, tears running down his cheeks, and a burst bladder. His expression showed fear, trauma and the lost of will to live. Call me crazy, but looking at a dying person in his eyes gave me a burst of laughter in that nightmare of mine.
Next, which happened exactly 3 days ago. Me and a group of friends slaughtered this clan of assassins, not sparring the kids and toddlers. What really got me disgusted was that, I ripped apart 3 children's bodies, stuffed them in a suitcase, guts and all, threw it to a guy who went hysterical after seeing the contents, then blew up a hole in his head. It didn't end there, I got hunted down, although I killed a few men and women alike, and totally dismembered their body, finally got taken down. Woke up in cold sweat.
Finally, 2 days ago. A search was initiated for a criminal who's infamous for a massacre that cost 30 people their lives. The chase was finally narrowed down to a mall, and successfully, we captured him. Everything looked alright, just a normal Cop-and-criminal situation, but somehow, it looked as if the cop went criminal. The next few minutes were a blur, but I remembered vividly that I started to grab a foldable chair and with sheer force, brutally swing it straight to his face. His skins ripped, his skull cracked, but he was still, laughing? My adrenaline and fear came into play, and I started to crack his neck, break his bones, tear his guts out, and pop his eyes off their socket. True enough, the cop went criminal, the last one laughing was me.
You know, this experience really made me think who I really am, maybe there's a darker and more.. Violent side of me? But what I really fear is that, this violence and sadism that's only expressed in my dreams would come into reality, and turn me into something I loathe.
Then again, what are nightmares? Are they dreams gone wrong? Or are they just your manifestation of your deepest, darkest secrets? Or maybe just your fear taking control.
Personally, I don't know. But I sincerely hope it's none of the above, and they're just random things that flood your head. Because if they were a manifestation of your thoughts or secrets, or maybe a metaphor of what you feel.. Then why does my dreams these days reek of killing and death..?
No, I'm not lying, and no, I'm not exaggerating. Maybe I've lost some of the details, but they're not too far from what I dreamt about. So please bear with me on my.. gruelling description.
First, it happened quite a long time ago, around 2 weeks ago, right when I came back from Hongkong. It was pretty vague, a bunch of guys said they had problems with how I acted and came to 'settle things'. And before you know it, it went horribly wrong. I went ahead and pull a punch on their 'leader's' face, slamming his face till it was bleeding, then smacking his face down on the floor, totally rupturing his nose, before I grabbed a metal plank and smashed it on his face. ( Which I must admit felt pretty darn good. ) Then it flashed to a scene I ripped his clothings apart and impaled the plank somewhere guys are weak at. What was infront of me was a boy, with a bleeding head that's slightly twitching, tears running down his cheeks, and a burst bladder. His expression showed fear, trauma and the lost of will to live. Call me crazy, but looking at a dying person in his eyes gave me a burst of laughter in that nightmare of mine.
Next, which happened exactly 3 days ago. Me and a group of friends slaughtered this clan of assassins, not sparring the kids and toddlers. What really got me disgusted was that, I ripped apart 3 children's bodies, stuffed them in a suitcase, guts and all, threw it to a guy who went hysterical after seeing the contents, then blew up a hole in his head. It didn't end there, I got hunted down, although I killed a few men and women alike, and totally dismembered their body, finally got taken down. Woke up in cold sweat.
Finally, 2 days ago. A search was initiated for a criminal who's infamous for a massacre that cost 30 people their lives. The chase was finally narrowed down to a mall, and successfully, we captured him. Everything looked alright, just a normal Cop-and-criminal situation, but somehow, it looked as if the cop went criminal. The next few minutes were a blur, but I remembered vividly that I started to grab a foldable chair and with sheer force, brutally swing it straight to his face. His skins ripped, his skull cracked, but he was still, laughing? My adrenaline and fear came into play, and I started to crack his neck, break his bones, tear his guts out, and pop his eyes off their socket. True enough, the cop went criminal, the last one laughing was me.
You know, this experience really made me think who I really am, maybe there's a darker and more.. Violent side of me? But what I really fear is that, this violence and sadism that's only expressed in my dreams would come into reality, and turn me into something I loathe.
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posted by EricJK at
6:41 AM
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